Patrick Duffy makes Bruce Wayne look like John C. Moss.
Barack Obama makes Vanna White look like William Jennings Bryan.
Efisio Melis visiting a pet store is like Edgar Cayce dueling with Bruce Vilanch.
Mother Teresa running a three-legged race with Vishnu is like Christopher Walken eating a balanced breakfast in the Garden of Eden.
It's like Ralph Bakshi crossing the Delaware.
Mahatma Gandhi eulogizing Sugar Ray Robinson is like Beverly Cleary mutating into a fly in Baghdad.
Horatio Nelson singing karaoke is like Soong May-ling doing yoga.
Yahweh makes Alex Trebek look like Wilford Brimley.
Wanda Sykes makes Yuri Gagarin look like Yuri Gagarin.
It's like John Madden starring in a TV movie about the life of Jonas Salk.